Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I've tried to read more this semester than I usually do. Normally, I don't read anything that isn't school related, because I'll get caught up in reading for pleasure instead of doing schoolwork. But this semester, I've tried to replace watching tv and movies with reading, and it's turned out pretty well so far. I also read before I go to bed. I can read for pleasure late at night, because if I don't comprehend everything I read, I can re-read it, and I won't be tested on it the next day. Not so for school reading. I absolutely love to read. There are so many great books out there. My favorite genre is probably christian fiction- mostly suspense/romance/mystery. I also enjoy reading books like the one mentioned above. Books that get me thinking about important things in life. So, if you have a good book recommendation, leave me a comment. I'd love to hear them.
Going into the week, I thought that it would be pretty much the most terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week ever. I had 4 tests+my regular homework. YUCK! It hasn't been so bad thus far however. I took my trig test about 2 hours ago, and that turned out much, much better than I expected. I have two tests tomorrow, back to back, that I have to study a good bit for-Spanish and Psychology. Psych won't be so bad, but I need to study alot for Spanish; lots of nit picky things to remember. And last but not least, my Small Group Communication test on Friday. Yuck, a test on Friday. Oh well. It won't be terrible. So, because I'm processing this overload in small pieces, I'm not freaking out about it.
I just got an email that my 11 o'clock class is cancelled tomorrow. Hooray!!! :) More time to slee-I mean study, of course...
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Today I was walking on the drill field, and heard someone yelling. It was a guy standing on the retaining wall that circles the flag pole in the middle of the drill field. He was yelling at the top of his lungs. I rolled my eyes as I passed by, thinking to myself, "Cool weather is coming and bringing the crazies with it." Every year, different people go to the middle of the drill field and "preach" aka yell Jesus at people. Even the Christians I know think they're crazy and annoying. But as I walked by, I began to listen to what he was saying. I couldn't hear every word, but from what I did hear, I didn't disagree with what the guy was saying-or rather, yelling. He was saying that God gave up his only son, just so you can go to heaven, that God loves you, and desires that none should perish (quoting scripture). I realized that I didn't disagree with his message, just his method of delivery. I walked by fellow classmates and heard this phrase several times: "And then I heard 'Jesus'..." Basically what they were saying was that they stopped to listen, or they were curious about what all the commotion was, until they heard him say 'Jesus.' After that, they discounted him as another religious nut who was condemning people to hell. I started thinking about that phrase "And then I heard 'Jesus.'" Instead of yelling "Jesus loves you!" in people's faces, what if we lived "Jesus loves you"? What if our kindness, love, and humility showed the love of Christ to everyone we come across day-to-day? Would they instead say "And then I saw Jesus..." or "And then I experienced Jesus..."? How would the rest of their sentence-the rest of their lives-change? If people could see Jesus in us, instead of just hear it, how many more lives would be touched? True witnessing to me is not walking up to some random person walking down the side walk and telling them in rapid fire mode "God loves you and he sent Jesus to die for you so you can live forever and ever with him in heaven and have a more fulfilling and wonderful life do you want to receive Jesus in your heart right now I can pray with you and you can know for sure that you're going to heaven if you died at this very moment!" How effective is that? I would freak out if someone did that to me, and I'm a Christian! True witnessing to me is going out of your way to demonstrate love to the people you are around, developing relationships, and showing how Christ has made you different. How are you going to show Christ's love to someone today? How am I going to show Christ's love to someone today?
Monday, October 20, 2008
Than try to fix what's going on
But the problem keeps on calling
Even with the cellphone gone
She told him that she believes in living
Bigger than she's living now
But her world keeps spinning backwards
Don't say so long, and throw yourself wrong
Don't spend today away
Cuz today will soon be
Gone, like yesterday is gone,
Like history is
Gone, just try and prove me wrong
And pretend like you're immortal
She said "He said live like no tomorrow"
Every day we borrow
Brings us one step closer to the edge (infinity)
Where's your treasure, where's your hope
If you get the world and lose your soul
She pretends like she pretends like she's immortal
Don't say so long
You're not that far gone
This could be your big chance to makeup
Today will soon be
Gone, like yeterday is gone,
Like history is gone,
The world keeps spinning on,
Your going going gone,
Like summer break is gone,
Like saturday is gone
Just try and prove me wrong
You pretend like your immortal your immortal
We are not infinite
We are not permanent
We're so confident
In our accomplishments
Look at our decadence
Gone, like Frank Sinatra
Like Elvis and his mom
Like AL Pacino's cash nothing lasts in this life
My highschool dreams are gone
My childhood sweets are gone
Life is a day that doesn't last for long
Life is more than money
Time was never money
Time was never cash,
Life is still more than girls
Life is more than hundred dollar bills
And roto-tom fills
Life's more than fame and rock and roll and thrills
All the riches of the kings end up in wills
We got information in the information age
But do we know what life is
Outside of our convenient Lexus cages
She said "He said live like no tomorrow"
Every moment that we borrow
Brings us closer to the God who's not short of cash
Hey Bono i'm glad you asked
Life is still worth living, life is still worth living
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Monday, October 13, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
I'm back from fall break. Just came home from the airport. It was a long, tiring, and melancholy 2 hours, and I came home to an empty house. I'm glad I have dogs, or it would have been really depressing. This is one night where I wish it would storm. I could use some thunder and lightning right about now. The weekend was...insightful, difficult, wonderful, reassuring-all at the same time. There are so many things going through my head, it's hard to iron all the wrinkles out. Good thoughts, hopeful thoughts, sad thoughts, and difficult thoughts. God has been dealing with me for a while, but it just seemed to hit home over the weekend. Someone this weekend said that whenever you have an encounter with God, you're effected, different, changed. I definitely feel effected.
- Sometimes I think finality is more difficult than uncertainty...
I'm reading an amazing book right now, called The Shack by WM. Paul Young. It's a really great book so far. Even though it's fiction, it reveals some amazing things about God, us, and our relationship with the Trinity. I won't say too much about it until I finish, but this book has already given me much insight. I cannot wait to post some of the quotations from this book that have absolutely stopped me in my tracks.
- "It's not always the harshest words that bring us understanding, Sometimes it's the quiet things, said or left unsaid" -From the song "That Old Man" by Tim Grimm
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Last night was a good night. I watched a good movie and had a good conversation on the phone. I slept well, and when I got up this morning (after hitting the snooze about 3 times) I was feeling good, and decently hopeful about the day. I'm really looking forward to the weekend and can't wait til it gets here, but I'm trying not to let the rest of the days pass me by. Many blessings can be contained in a single day. Anyway, I was almost late to class but wound up arriving right on time. Good start to the morning, I think. Things have started going downhill though. I had an awkward conversation (which was kind of frustrating, cause neither of us said what we were really thinking), and then a troubling email. Definitely enough to bring a good mood down a notch. I have a group meeting at 4, so I wasn't exactly thrilled about staying on campus for an extra two hours. I'm trying not to have a bad day...we'll see how well that works out.
I bought a bluegrass cd yesterday that has lots of hymns on it. I love to listen to and sing hymns. The music is beautiful and the lyrics poignant. One line of the hymn "When I Survey The Wondrous Cross" has been stuck in my head since I heard it last night: "Love so amazing, so divine, demands my soul, my life, my all." That part of the last verse just jumps out at me when I listen to it. Just about gives me chill bumps. It almost seems to tie together with what I was talking about in one of my previous posts. Still something I'm thinking about...
How hard it is to really stay connected with people has really been impressed upon me lately. How many times I've taken people and relationships for granted. When you see someone every day, you don't really think about working to keep that relationship going. It's easy to just talk and feel as if you're close. It's when you have to maintain relationships where the person isn't right next to you, not present in your day-to-day life. Friendships, family relationships, and dating relationships. And it doesn't have to be someone who is miles and miles away. It can be someone who is next door, but you just don't run into them every day. It takes work to spend time with someone, to involve them in your life, and be involved in theirs. It can be done, however, if both are willing to designate time and effort. I know I don't set aside enough time for people sometimes. I get "busy." I put that in quotation because how many times have we used that one word as a catch-all excuse in our lives? Everyone is busy! If you're not, then you probably should be. Working and staying busy is part of a good work ethic. We need work to be a part of our lives. So how can you stay connected with people even though you're "busy?" I think it takes getting your priorities straight and honest-to-goodness effort. With some relationships, I've got it all straight. I set aside time for that person, and without meaning to, effectively cut off everyone else. Sometimes things are so lopsided in my life. I'll do great in one area, but lack greatly in another. Life is such a tightrope walk. Even an inch in one direction or the other and you wind up on the floor.
Fall is on it's way. The leaves are starting to fall and the air has a bit of a bite in it (try saying that five times fast). Fall is my favorite time of year. I love the weather-and the clothes that I get to wear. :)
It just occurred to me that this is my first October post. So Happy October!