Thursday, February 17, 2011

Blahs and Boo-hoos

The past two weeks have been stressful. I haven't been in a great mood.  One of those moods where all the little things start meshing together and making one Big Thing that threatens to eat me whole. Not so fond of that feeling.  At least it's not the breathing under water feeling.  But the past two weeks have been especially trying. I'm to that "I can't do anything right" point. I'm disappointing people right and left. My feelings get hurt way too easily. I cry at the drop of a hat. I've had a perpetual headache for about a week now.  Exhausted from the time I step out of bed.  School is getting the better of me.  Yikes.  It's a mess.

Today was rough. I wished I could wake up and try it all over again from the beginning.  I'm not sure why these two weeks have been so rough.  Nothing earth-shattering have happened.  Just small things popping up.  A large part of it is my mood and not feeling well.  I'm being strongly encouraged to go to the doctor about it, but I'm not so keen on that idea.  I know I need to though. Ugh.

I'm tired but I'm in no mood to sleep.  I need to work some things out of my system.  I'm aware that 1:36 a.m. is a bad time to do that, but it is what it is.  I have the urge to go back and read my old journals right now.  I was watching a show earlier that was talking about a journal this guy had back when he was a teenager and how his mom found it and read it.  I have several old journals about random stuff.  Most of them were when I was a teenager too. We'll see what I find.

I'll get to sleep eventually.

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