I don't even know where to start. The emotions I have swirling through my head are enough to make even the most emotionally stable person collapse in a heap. I am trying so hard to make things work. I am balancing relationships on either side and myself caught in the middle. I have to think for myself, but also consider what each side is saying. If I try to do what I want to do, I'm accused of acting as someone else wants me to. I do have a mind of my own. At any given time, someone is going to be upset with me. I've almost come to terms with this. That's a big almost.
I hate this limbo I'm in. I am 22 years old. A recent graduate. I have a gnawing desire to be out on my own, doing my thing. I can't make that happen right now and it's about to kill me. I am not a patient person. I have waited and waited for the answer I need, and still haven't heard. I don't know what plan B is. I want plan A to work. Why can't my phone ring, and on the other end hear, "you're hired!"? I need to get hired, get an apartment, get a car, and start living my life as a 22 year old woman. That's what I need.
1 comment:
Life is never about just you alone. We are so entwined with the lives of the ones we love, that what we do affects everyone around us.
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